After Dave is left behind and divorced by his wife, he begins to think about what could have been. As he begins to pine after an old high school girlfriend of his, one of his friends advises Dave to go to a church support group for divorced people. There he meets a creepy woman who takes it upon herself to vicariously live Dave’s life and to help him in going back to meet the old girlfriend he’s pining after. As Dave finally plans to go meet her, the suspense builds as he drives back and forth outside her house and borderline stalks her. Will he ever get to talk to her again?
Production Quality (1 point)
This awkwardly-titled film has one good merit, and this is some production quality. While the video quality and camera work are good, as well as some of the sets, it’s beyond us why anyone would spend money on such a useless piece of entertainment. Audio quality is also okay, but the soundtrack is snore-inducing. There was clearly no editing in this film as tons of useless and empty footage was included, probably in an effort to make this painful slog longer than it was. Besides a few production high marks (which should be standard), this movie is all downhill from here.
Plot and Storyline Quality (0 points)
In perhaps the most useless and pathetic plot we have ever seen, immature conflicts dominate the silly dialogue as a bunch of middle aged people whine about what could have been in high school. As the scenes progress from melancholy to melodramatic to boring, nothing really happens as we are forced to witness Dave drive around, go to work, talk on the phone, go to support group, and hang out with a creepy and desperate woman. Sometimes there are huge gaps without a single spoken word as characters just stare at things while the piano music plays. Besides all this, there is no way to make this sort of plot interesting or palatable, so why make it at all?
Acting Quality (0 points)
As usual for Christiano casts, the cast members are overly practiced in their line delivery. The emotions are empty and they generally leave much to be desired. Unfortunately, the cast is so small, there is really no potential here.
What was even the point of making this plot? The idea literally has no potential and is so absurd that we have to question whether going after (married!) old flames should even be encouraged among Christians. Was this really all the Christiano brothers could come up with? We would expect something much more sanctimonious and pious than this. Where is the potential in watching a middle aged man pine after his old girlfriend, who’s now married? Don’t even get me started about using divorce support groups as a dating service. We can’t even comprehend the motive behind this film and must just leave it as a useless movie you shouldn’t waste your time on.
Final Rating: 1 out of 10 points
This movie really has the worst title I have ever seen, who approved it and what does it mean?