What am I doing in this movie?

Plot Summary

When Amelia and Levi decide to head West to score a fortune in gold, they never anticipated the hardships they would have to face.  After Levi dies, Amelia is forced to survive in the wild alone.  Watch with bated breath as she tries to light fires, searches for food, arranges rocks to call for help, rummages around empty covered wagons, stumbles around the terrain, and breathes heavily in an attempt to fight for her very life.  You will be left in suspense as you are forced to endure long sequences without dialogue and wonder if there is really any talking in this film.  The drama builds as Amelia thinks back to days gone by and wonders why this is even a movie.  Who will outlast the other: Amelia or her bored audience?

 

Production Quality (.5 point)

So it’s clear that whatever this film is called is an attempt to be a creative and artsy Christian survival movie thingy.  But it just totally fails.  First off, production is very cheap-looking, including poor lighting, cheap audio quality, and a nonexistent soundtrack.  Camera work is shaky in an attempt to be dramatic.  Video quality is okay, and at least the sets, props, and locations are realistic-looking, but there is really not much going on here.  This was a very limited idea that required no editing—this film simply exists.  Since there’s not much else going for it, this production needed to be flawless, yet it fell short.

Plot and Storyline Quality (.5 point)

Believe it or not, if you last until the ending, there is actually an interesting idea somewhere here, but it’s not likely to be discovered by most viewers.  The trailer for this movie is better than the actual movie itself and sets up the viewer for huge disappointment.  The true bulk of this story of a woman performing activities of daily living in the wilderness—like, literally everything she does.  Aside from some pathetic flashbacks that do nothing to build the few characters there are, there is zero dialogue for a full hour of runtime.  Even when there is dialogue, it’s a one-sided conversation.  There is truly zero storyline here as the viewer is forced to endure fake drama and sequences of the main character staring and breathing hard.  This story was clearly written for the end, but this cripples any good idea that was had since no one will ever know what it is.  Creating movies for one tiny idea should always be a no-no, but apparently people keep getting funding for this sort of nonsense.

Acting Quality (0 points)

In a movie with so few characters, the few people that are cast are highly crucial to the film’s success.  Unfortunately, in this one, the cast members do not come through.  Their performances are amateurish and forceful, and have far too much heavy breathing.  Emotions are not felt or believable.  In short, this rounds out a pathetic effort.

Conclusion

As a rule, one-character survival plots should be greatly avoided.  Half-baked ideas that have no surrounding elements such as professional production and well-developed characters are always going to fail.  Even if your idea is small and limited in scope, you can still develop your characters.  But alas, this is another failed movie that represents more money flushed down the toilet.  2013 sure was a landmark year for Christian film, but not in a good way.  Let’s hope we can move past those dark days.

 

Final Rating: 1 out of 10 points

 

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